Take a deep breath ....

Because yes, this is another post from me. And just a day after my last post. I know. I will wait for you to get up off the floor from the shock .......


There. I hope you didn't hurt yourself :)

Today is alright. I finished the hat I started knitting on Saturday and I love it. I wore it in to the office today and was a smidge disappointed that nobody commented on it. I got a few odd looks, so I guess peeps weren't a fan. But whatevs, I love it and that is all that matters.

I ordered a bracelet and a ring from Stella & Dot through Amanda and it arrived today. I love them both! Esp the bracelet, because it is totally like a slinky! Good times.

I am going to yoga after work and while I really don't want to, I need to and I know I will feel good after its done.

Last night was support group and it was fantastic! I got to see my BBF, Beth and a couple of other ladies that are super fun. We talked about a lot of things and one thing really hit home with me. Why do we sabotage ourselves? I wish I knew. Because I totally do. After some discussion with the group and some emailing with my buddy Cat, I have determined that I am afraid to reach my goal. Afraid because I don't know what life will be like when I get there. At least where I am now is familiar. I'm not FAT anymore. I'm not thin either, but I'm way better off than where I was. I know how to deal with life at this weight. I don't know what it will be like when I get to 165 or 150. What if it is too hard? What if I'm still not happy with my size. What if pigs start to fly?! I know. Things that I shouldn't be concerned with right now. And it dawned on me why my weight loss has stalled. Since I am more of a "normal" size now, I am not working as hard on doing what I need to do to lose. It is not as urgent of an issue anymore. My health is not at risk. I am not uncomfortable. People no longer stare at me for being the fattest girl in the room. I blend in. So why should I sacrifice to keep going? Because. Because I don't want to give up. I don't want to only be "OK" with my size/weight. I want to be healthy and happy and beautiful and everything I know I should be.

I'm not going to make any huge proclamations about what I am going to do differently from today forward. Because I know that every minute of every day is a struggle. It will be for the rest of my life. I will have to take them one at a time, and convince myself during times of struggle that making the better choices more often than not is the best thing for me. It is what I need to do. I need to stop lying to myself that this or that or the other is not THAT bad. I need to stop making excuses and just get over myself and do it. Whatever IT is. I need to put my money where my mouth is and lead by example. It's time to get on with the getting on.

Struggles and Life

Hello all my friends out there in blog land! I bet you thought I'd fallen off the face of the earth! Well, I have not. I would say that I have fallen off the wagon, but honestly I don't think I've really been on it in a while. I am trying to hang on as best I can right now until my brain clicks again and I can make myself do what I need to do.

But enough of that!

How is everyone?! Other than my weight (which isn't horrible), I'm doing really well right now! Life is good, work is good, hubby is good, kitties are good, family is family (ha!) and for once I'm not stressing about the holidays. I usually don't enjoy this time of year because of the stress of gifts and food and parties and commitments, etc. But I'm not letting it bother me this year.

So, what's been going on with me ... hmm, how about some bullet points? In no particular order :)

• I told y'all I got a new car, and I love her. She is so much fun and I am super happy with my decision! 
• My BFF and I went to San Antonio for the weekend a little bit back. We took the Amtrak train from Fort Worth to San Antonio. It was a lot of fun! It takes 8 hours to get from FW to SA, but on the way down we had a 2 hour delay outside of Austin. It was alright, and no delays on the way home. However, after we got off the train in FW, the train goes over to Dallas before it heads on towards Chicago and there was a shooting on the train! 1 person killed (the bad guy) and 2 injured (1 undercover cop and an innocent bystander). It had to do with drugs. It was a little weird to think that it happened on the very train that we had been on all day. The 2 injured will be alright, they were fairly minor injuries. While we were in SA we had a great time. We walked up and down the riverwalk a bunch of times and shopped up a storm in the market. We had a lot of great Mexican food and laughed up a storm. It was cold and rainy but that did not dampen our spirits. On the train ride there and back, we worked on knitting some flip top mittens. I got one mitten a little more than 1/2 way done, Just need to do the thumb and the flip top part. I'll get some pics up when I'm finished.
• Surprisingly (to me anyway), work is going pretty smooth right now. It is surprising because it is nearing Christmas and I work in retail. I've been lucky that people have been actually finishing their work on time (or beforehand) so that I haven't had to rush. Plus I've been able to have my friend Kathy come in and help me out with some work a couple of times. It has been rather nice actually.
• I've seen the Twilight: Breaking Dawn pt. 1 movie 5 times in the theater so far. Yes, I realize I am a 40 year old woman. I love the story and am a smidge obsessed with Robert Pattinson :) Go ahead, mock and judge. I don't care!
• James and I are both taking off the week between Christmas and New Year's from work. I'm pretty excited about it. I have no idea what we are going to do yet. I do know that I want to go see the Sherlock Holmes movie and The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo movie. We will probably catch up on some other Netflix movies and play computer games, etc. I expect it to be a relaxing and fun time.
• Tonight is my support group and I get to see my BBF Beth Ann! Yay!!! I'm excited :)
• I got my Christmas present early ... a Kindle Fire! I got it yesterday and am in love with it already. I am new to the Android OS so I've got some things to learn and figure out but so far it is amazing.

That's all I can think of right now so I'm going to close for the moment. I hope you all have a wonderful day and a wonderful week!

xoxoxoxo!

I'm not dead, I promise!

I've been MIA, and I promise it isn't because I've gone off the weight loss rails.

It's pretty much all work related. Holiday season has arrived in the retail world and that has me busier than I like to be normally.

I'm trying my best to lose, but so far am only managing to maintain. Up a couple, down a couple. Y'all know the drill. Its frustrating but I am keeping my eyes on the prize.

I will write more later, I swear! The best news of the day is that it looks like I will be getting my new car tomorrow! Yay!!!! She is a 2012 VW Beetle and her name is Tallulah :)

Free Shoes for Life!!!

I got an email this morning from Famous Footwear and in tiny print at the bottom they had a contest/drawing thing listed and the title is Free Shoes for Life.

Well, with all the shoe love going on in the sisterhood, I HAD to share!!!

Good luck :)
http://www.famousfootwear.com/shoesforlife

Busy Beeeeee

Goodness, I feel like I've been gone for ages!

Last Friday and Saturday I went with my BFF to a knitting workshop to learn how to do a knitting technique called Entrelac. It was a lot of fun and I indeed did learn how to do Entrelac ;)  I also - and my knitting b0obs will appreciate this - learned how to knit/purl in both directions (i.e. no turning your work!). Man is that convenient!

Sunday, James and I went up to work and moved his computer and stuff to his new cube for him to start his new position on Monday. That was cool, there aren't a lot of people at our office on Sunday's so it sort of felt like being at school during the summer, ha! Then we went to yoga and back home to chill. The Walking Dead started back up with an amazing episode, if you like zombies you should check it out on AMC.

Yesterday I had work and then yoga. It was a great class! I have officially moved up to the intermediate level and am really enjoying it. And I'm not scared of the all levels classes anymore. I'm still getting acclimated to the heat in that room, but otherwise I feel like it is a good challenge when I want to kick it up a notch (BAM!).

Today was more work - which is a whole other drama situation I don't want to think about right now - and was supposed to be more yoga. But James and I were just exhausted. We intended to go, so after work we went to PetSmart to get some kitty food and then to eat some dinner at Baker Brothers (I had a wonderful Texas Cobb salad, yum) and then to Target to pick up a few things. We still had about an hour before class started so we went over to the VW dealership that is nearby to see about test driving one of the new Beetles. I've been thinking about getting one ever since they announced. I have a 2005 New Beetle right now and I love it, but the new 2012's have the option for a lot more bells and whistles that I really want. Anyhoo, after that we decided we were tuckered out and just went home.

So here I sit, getting caught up on reading and commenting on blogs from the past 5 days and then posting to all you wonderful peeps out there in blogland! I'm probably going to hit the hay early-ish tonight ... y'all sleep tight!

Texas mini-Bo0bs!

Hellooo!!!

As Beth said, I will be taking over the coordination of this outing for Saturday Nov 12th. We are planning on meeting in Waco for an extended lunch and who knows what!

Let me know if you are interested in coming so we can get all the deets figured out!

Yay!!

A thru Z of Me!

This has been done by several peeps .. and since I love these kinds of things, I am joining in!

1. Age - 40
2. Bed size - King
3. Chore you dislike - Cleaning the bathroom
4. Dogs - Currently we have 3 cats, but I have owned several Cocker Spaniels in my life. The next time I get a dog, I want a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel :)
5. Essential start to your day - Uhm … waking up? Other than that, I play it by ear.
6. Favorite color - Blue
7. Gold or silver - Silver
8. Height - 5' 7"
9. Instruments you play(ed) - Piano and Flute
10. Job title - Web Production Designer
11. Kids - Nope. On purpose thankyouverymuch.
12. Live - Fort Worth, Texas
13. Mom's name - Julie
14. Nicknames - deb, debbles, debidoodle, debster
15. Overnight hospital stays - Never had one, WLS was in and out home by 9:30am!
16. Pet peeves - when people interrupt me while I'm talking
17. Quote from a movie - "I feel like I'm taking CRAZY PILLS!" - Mugatu, from Zoolander
18. Righty or Lefty - Lefty all the way. And I'm quite offended that this is the "R" question and not the "L" question.
19. Siblings - 1 older brother, Scott. Then also 3 older step-sisters from my step-mother and 1 older step-brother, 1 older step-sister and 1 younger step-brother from my step-father.
20. Time you wake up - As late as possible in order to get where I have to be. OR whenever my cats wake me up.
21. Underwear - Yes.
22. Vegetables you don't like - Tomato. Although I like ketchup and salsa … go figure. Also mushrooms, olives and all kinds of peppers.
23. What makes you run late - Being awake
24. X-rays you've had - teeth and boobies!
25. Yummy food you make - Buttermilk Pie
26. Zoo animal favorites - Lions are my favorite, but I also like the Flamingos, Giraffes, Elephants and Monkeys. (Click the links to see pictures I've taken of those animals at the Fort Worth Zoo!)

First time for everything ...

I went and had my first unfill yesterday. It was very small but man the difference is crazy good!

Before Chicago I had started to notice that I was having a little heartburn here and there, but not anything that I thought I should be worried about. I thought it could be stress or that I was eating too much too fast. Well, wait ... let's back up a smidge. On Aug 29th I went in for a fill and ended up getting .4 and was OK with that. However, the tech said that my pouch looked a little bit stretched which had me semi-freaking out. Fast forward a couple of weeks and this is when I started noticing the heartburn.  But there was a lot going on and I thought it was me. So I figured I'd work on it and see how I felt after Chicago. While at Bo0bs2.O I was able to eat just fine - not too much, but plenty - and wasn't noticing the heartburn as much.

Then after I got home I noticed I was a lot tighter and the heartburn was coming around every evening. At the end of last week it was becoming a big annoyance. I was having a hard time drinking anything more than water, which is bad since I take some medication in liquid form that is mixed in with orange juice. I could barely take a sip without it just sitting there, crazy. And I was starting to contemplate taking some Tums or something for the heartburn. That made me think that I should probably go to the doc.

I called yesterday morning to see when they could get me in. Fortunately they said I could come that day, at 2:30pm. The receptionist at the surgery center where I get my fills is just a grumpy lady in general I have decided. When I called I told her I thought I needed a small unfill because I was having some heartburn and having trouble with liquids esp in the mornings. Her comment - in a quite condescending tone - was "Well, are you able to keep anything down at all?" To which I repeated myself (which always thrills me) and she sighed and scheduled me to come in that afternoon. I'm tossing out a big 'ol WHAT.E.VER. to her. :)

I got there and went in to the fill room, both techs were awesome about the whole thing. They said that I absolutely did the right thing by coming in, that anytime you have heartburn it isn't a good sign and that that was the whole reason they were there and that I should never feel bad about coming in. That made me feel so much better. The funny thing is that they ended up taking out .4, which is the exact amount they put in at my last fill. So apparently I didn't really need it after all! But on a good note ... they said my pouch looked really good, no stretching anymore.  So whew for that!

+++

In other news, today has been sucky at work. I even sat here and cried at my desk for a while. It is mostly just frustration. They are pushing to up our work load and have hired several people to help out with that in a few other groups, but I don't get any help. So I'll have more things coming in to me to get done but I will still be doing my part of the job all alone. Pardon my little pity party, I'll get over it soon.

Tonight I am going to an all levels yoga class! Only the 2nd one I'll have ever tried. The last few beginners classes I've been to haven't been challenging enough for me. So I guess that means it is time to move on up to the east side ;) Wish me luck!

My Bo0bs Experience

It has taken me a few days to even begin to come out of the fantastic fog that was Chicago last weekend. I'm still not sure I will have the right words to describe what this trip meant to me.

First off, to my BBF Beth, you are amazingly incredible (even if you do think I'm slobby sometimes) and I love you so much! I am so very thankful that you got me into this whole hot mess of bUUbs!

Secondly, to my other pre-known B0OBs Dawnya and Ronnie, I am so glad we are in this together! Talking and texting and IM'ing with y'all is a true joy in my life.

And last-but-not-leastly, to all my new friends and sisters. I have never felt so welcomed into a group in my entire life. I have pretty much always felt a little bit left out where groups are concerned. I always had one or two friends to hang out with but never a group of people. I didn't get accepted into a sorority in college and in high school I was a band geek - and not even in with the "cool" band geeks!

Now while I love love loved meeting everyone and certainly didn't have enough time to spend with anyone, I have to mention a few people:

My roomies Justine and Krystal - y'all were great! I was nervous to room with people I'd never met but once I met both of you it was easy as pie. Thanks for being awesome!

The girlies I seemed to end up everywhere with! Brandi - my twin in more ways than one, Becky - my bundle of sunshine, Amanda - you are the cutest thing ever!, Ms. M - send me a pic when you get your new nose ring!, Stacey - you are full of quiet hilarity, thanks for sharing the shuttle. It wasn't the same going back without you (the driver was a crazy man)!

There were quite a few peeps I wish I'd been able to chat with more (that's what next year is for right?!). So watch out Maria, Shannon, Grace, Read, Angela, Fluffy, Jenny, Draz, LBG, Joey, Catherine, Carmen, and Liz :)

As for my activities …
I arrived Thursday evening at 7pm, met up with Stacey in baggage claim and we walked a billion miles to find our shuttle to the hotel. After we found it, all was right with the world and we made it to the hotel in no time. We promptly jumped out of the van when we saw Beth, Stephanie Joy and Brandi and yelled Booo0oooBS!!!!! Hahahaha! Ok, well maybe it was just me jumping out and yelling, I think Stacey just looked at me like I was nuts (which I kinda am). I got checked in and went to drop my stuff off in the room. The next bit of time was a blur but then I got dressed (in an actual dress thankyouverymuch) and we all headed off to the drag show. It was my first one and I loved it! I think we all had a great time and some angel took care of the bar tab at the end. Whoever that was, thank you so much! That was super duper nice of you! Afterwards, a few of us went on back to the hotel and just chilled out. I think I got to sleep before 2 that night.

Friday morning Beth and I got up and met at 9am to go and see about getting massages but when we got there we found out it was pretty much by appointment only. So we called and made appointments for the next afternoon. Then we went and did some shopping! We found a really cool store called Arts & Artisans on Michigan Ave on the other side of the river that had all kinds of stuff that was not mass produced. Clothing, jewelry, scarves, wall art, clocks, you name it. I ended up getting a cool sweater/jacket thing and a scarf and Beth got 2 scarves, earrings and a super cute coat. We asked the sales associate for a suggestion for lunch and he told us about Sweetwater which was just a block down so we went and ate up some yummies. We split some divine Mac & Cheese and also some Chips & Guacamole. They were both delish. Then we went to get ready for the Good Times on Michigan Ave walking tour. That was pretty fun, but went on a smidge too long. 75-90 minutes would have done me just fine. But either way we got to see some fun things, take lots of pictures and I got to chat it up with a lot of super fun people! It was hungry time, so Beth and I called Krystal and we went to eat at an Italian place I found on UrbanSpoon called Coco Pazzo Cafe. We felt like old people since it was 4:30 but it was pretty tasty! Then it was time for a little rest and the Friday night meet & greet. I chose to go slobby :) It was fun to see everyone all together and I even won a door prize, woo hoo! I decided I should step it up a little bit and went to the room to shower and get ready before heading over to Second City for a comedy show. That was really fun, and I laughed a lot! Now I will be keeping an eye out for any of those performers in case they show up on SNL. It was another late night getting to bed at 2am.

Saturday I woke up bright and early and put on my workout clothes! I met Beth, Dawnya, Becky and Catherine in the lobby at 8:45 and we went to Jazzercise! It was my first experience with Jazzercise and it was a lot of fun. I think I did pretty good on keeping up with the steps. I only had a couple of times where I got my feet all mixed up and plenty of times I did things backwards from the way the teacher was doing it, but hey … I was at least doing it! Afterwards, we decided to walk back to the hotel and I think that was one of the funnest things of the whole weekend. We just laughed and chatted and walked and had the best time together :) When we got back I did a quick shower and then Beth, Krystal and I headed over to meet FitBy40 at Carmine's for lunch. The waitress was VERY zen and in no hurry to get anything done in a jiffy. We finally had to say something so we wouldn't be late to get our massages. The food was pretty good, although I enjoyed my lasagna at the place from yesterday more. Anyway, we finally got out of there and headed to the spa. We made it right in time and the massages were pretty good. I think they did a fantastic job on my back, neck and feet but everything else was just "ok". All in all it was worth it. We walked around and did a little more shopping after that, including a trip to Trader Joe's (which was cool, but I don't see what all the fuss is about). Then it was back to the hotel for a proper shower and to get ready for the fancy dinner with everyone. All the ladies looked so fantastic and there were camera's snapping at every turn of the head. I got to sit at a table with Beth, Stacey, Ronnie, Krystal and Brandi. We had a great time, especially with those yummy drinks they were pushing. Once all our bellies were full, we headed back to the hotel for the pajama party! That was super fun :) Carmen and I were sporting the same sock monkey pj bottoms, that girl has great taste! I even picked up a pair of jeans at the clothing swap. I think I actually made it to bed by 1am that night, hee hee!

Sunday was a sad day because we were all leaving (boooooooooo!). Beth, Brandi and I went and had quite the breakfast eggstravaganza at Eggsperience the restaurant. It was really eggstraordinary to be with these two hotties and we had an eggstra good time. We wandered back to the hotel where people were starting to pack up and go. I am not very good with goodbyes so I kindof just held up in my room for the rest of the morning. I had arranged a late checkout for myself and didn't have to be gone from my room until 2pm. Justine left super early and Krystal left with Beth and Brandi at around 10:30ish. I chilled out and caught up on things happening around the Internet and on TV. Then I showered and packed and left my bags at the bell stand downstairs at 2pm. The shuttle was coming for me at 3:25pm so I had some time and spent it walking around Michigan Ave and stuff. I did make it over to lululemon and picked up a pair of yoga pants for me and a yoga shirt for my husband, all while having a great conversation with the sales associate about how someone should invent an exercise class called "ElliptiDance", I think it sounds super fun! I wandered back to the hotel and got on the shuttle, made it to the airport with no problems. Checked in and got through security and moseyed to my gate. Then I had like 2 hours to wait until I could board the plane. So I got myself a Starbucks Grande Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate (my 7th or 8th of the weekend), found a place to sit and watched some TV on my laptop until it was time to go. My flight home was uneventful, I actually was able to sleep a little bit. Got back to DFW and picked up my bag - so glad my luggage wasn't lost either coming or going, I'm terrified of that happening. My husband picked me up and we went home.

Next year I'm going to take Monday off of work to sleep and recover because I was completely useless all day! Live and learn, right.

I want to say a huge thank you to all the planners of this fantastic weekend. I know you worked so hard on every detail and it was very much appreciated. I can't imagine the weekend going any better, unless of course someone were to have given us a bag full of money with our swag ;)

I can't wait to do it all again next year!!!

Whirlwind of Fun

I'm sitting here in my room winding down and reflecting over this weekend. I had so much fun. I figured I would have a good time, but I never expected it to be like this. I have truly made some new life long friends and I'm already looking forward to next year!

Thanks for an unforgettable time to you all.

Now I need to pack ... Hah!

Scrambled Brains

I can't believe BOOBs is in 2 days. I still feel like I have a billion things to do before then - both at work and at home!

We've got a pretty big website update scheduled for Monday the 3rd which means I have to have everything done before I leave at noon on Thursday. I'm getting close to being done and I'm sure I'll make my deadline, I just don't like having to rush.

I haven't even started packing yet! But I usually don't until the day before. And since I'm not a clothes horse like a lot of you I won't be bringing 14 bags with every single piece of clothing I own. Hee hee :) Although, I have had a few assurances from the likes of Beth, Dawnya and Krystal that they will make sure I don't leave the hotel looking like enemy #1 on the fashion police's most wanted list.

Tonight I am going to my monthly Knitting Guild meeting. It is our first meeting of the season and I have to say that I'm not 100% thrilled to be going. The group is quite stagnant and if it wasn't for the fact that my BFF Debora is going to be there, I probably would skip it all together.

Last night I went to yoga, I've graduated to the Foundations level. No more Raw Beginner for me - whooooopie!!!!! It was pretty good and I think it is the place for me to be right now. I'm not quite there yet with my confidence and stamina for All Levels, but I've definitely outgrown Beginner. Plus now I will get exposure to some different teachers and start to meet some other people, so that is exciting!

Tomorrow night I am meeting up with some friends for more knitting. This time it is just a little informal group of girls that I hang out with some times. 2 of them had babies recently (one girl had twins) so we'd been taking a break to let them all get settled in with the new kiddos. I'll be glad to have that time with my pals again. I've missed them!

I got my hair trimmed and colored the other day .. I'm attaching a picture for your viewing pleasure. I seem to always be wearing the same shirt whenever I take a picture of myself! I swear I do own more shirts than just that one purple and gray one.

Have a great day everyone! And I'll see a lot of you on Thursday (or Friday) YAY!!!

BYOC!

1.  If you were a character on Friends, who would you be and why?

As much as I'd like to think I would be Rachel (gorgeous and put together), I am pretty sure I'm more Phoebe than anyone else. I'm a little bit nuts and tend to not worry about what other people think of me :)

2.  If you weren't in your current career what other career do you think you would have done?

I always wanted to be a singer. Like in a band. On the radio.

3. What did you want to be when you grew up when you were 6?

I never really had anything like that growing up. I don't remember ever saying I wanted to be this or that. I just enjoyed my life at the time. Dorky, I know.

4.  Do you think everyone only has one soulmate or true love? Or are there multiple people for everyone?

I honestly don't know. If you'd asked me when I was 18 and in love for the first time I would have said yes, everyone has a soulmate and true love exists. Now, I think that although it is possible for people to have a soulmate and find true love, that it doesn't happen very often and there isn't just one person for someone. I think you can make it work with many people, depending on where you both are in your lives and if you both want to. I guess after being hurt in the worst way, I'm a little cynical now. Sometimes it makes me sad.

5.  Repeat question.  Summarize your week in real life and in blog land.

Real Life: This has been a long week and I'm glad it is finally over. There has been a lot of garbage going on at work lately. Power struggles, ego wars, etc. It is exhausting. Outside of work, yoga was good this week. My house got cleaned yesterday and my cat is feeling better. So life is happy there. Plus fall TV has started back up, I'm going to a concert tonight with Beth, then Chicago next week with all of y'all and then to see Duran Duran with my BFF on 10/6!

Blog Land: I've been a big 'ol slacker. Partly because work has been sucking the life out of me and partly because I don't feel like I have anything exciting to say. I need to get better about that and find things to post about. Even if it isn't earth shattering, right? :)

Friday Randomness

I'm gonna shoot up this blog post. Get it? Shoot. Bullets. Eh, whatever .. here goes:

• This has been a busy and productive week at work for me. This might sound uber geeky to y'all but I learned how to write the code for a web page to display alternate, static content when the main content is a Flash piece so that devices that don't support Flash (i.e. iPad, etc.) will still see something and not a blank screen! Hey, it's the little things you know?
• I just caught up on reading and commenting on some blogs and I have to say y'all are inspiring.
• I have officially gone through the entire Raw Beginner rotation for Baptiste Power Vinyasa Yoga now. I am ready to move on to the Foundations level, which is the step between beginner and all levels! And also, I love my yoga studio! I got my very own yoga mat the other day (in, what else, but Midnight!) and a yogitoes (Sutra Collection, Bay). My friend/yoga teacher says I'm an official Yogi now :)
• I am getting so excited about Chicago! I've got all my reservations and tickets and everything ordered and paid for! I've been reading what everyone is saying about packing and what all to bring and how much, etc. I think I will go ahead and check a bag. I'd like to do some shopping while I'm there ... and to make that all possible we found out yesterday that we are getting our bonuses from work for the quarter next Friday. Yahooo!!!! 
• I miss Beth. She's been traveling A LOT lately and so I've not been able to chat with her as much as I usually do :( I miss you BBF!!!!!!!
• Monday is International Talk Like a Pirate Day. So, on Monday please refer to me by my official pirate name: Cap'n Avalon Leadblade. You can find your official pirate name here. :) Yarrrrrrrrr!
• I made an appointment to get my hair done next Saturday the 24th so that I'll be fresh and pretty when I meet you all on the 29th/30th!
• Blogger has a new iPhone app!!! I just downloaded it and it is free. Now I can blog from anywhere, yeah!
• I love bullet lists. I love when people do just posts of bullet lists. It makes me happy.
• I keep seeing the "10 Things Thursday" and want to do it but I always forget until Friday and think that if I try it then I'll have to do like "15 Fact Friday" or "17 Statement Saturday" and I don't know if I can come up with enough things to say. But I bet that I could since this is already my 10th bullet in this list.
• Fall TV is back! I am addicted to TV. You can judge if you want, I don't care. Here is a list of what I watch: 30 Rock, Addicted to Food, Alphas, Being Human (BBC Series), Bones, Breaking Bad, Burn Notice, Castle, Community, Covert Affairs, Criminal Minds, Doctor Who, Episodes, Eureka, Family Guy, Fringe, Game of Thrones, Glee, Haven, Hawaii Five-O, Heavy, House, How I Met Your Mother, Human Target, In Plain Sight, Jeopardy!, Law & Order: SVU, Law & Order: UK, Leverage, Mad Men, Rizzoli & Isles, Royal Pains, Rules of Engagement, SNL, Suits, The Big Bang Theory, The Big C, The Closer, The Glades, The Killing, The Mentalist, The Office, The Vampire Diaries, The Walking Dead, Too Fat for 15: Fighting Back, Torchwood, True Blood, Two and a Half Men, Warehouse 13, White Collar. There might be more, but that's all I could come up with at the moment :)
  And here are the new things this season I'm going to give a try: 2 Broke Girls, American Horror Story, Free Agents, New Girl, Person of Interest, Prime Suspect, Terra Nova, Up All Night.
  What do you watch?!?!?!?!?!?!

OK, I think I've blabbered on long enough for now ... Have a great weekend!

Oatmeal and Star Trek: TNG

I just wanted to check in and say Hi :) I'm on my lunch break sitting at my desk having some oatmeal and watching Star Trek: The Next Generation on my phone via Netflix!

We had support group last night and it was good ... it gave me the courage to toss out an unopened bag of chocolate almonds I had bought and not eaten yet. Yay!

Tonight is yoga, this week is the warrior series and it is kicking my butt! Well, more accurately it is kicking my quads! So keep me in mind tonight ... I hope I don't collapse. Hee hee!

Have a great rest of the day everyone!

I thought Friday's were supposed to be good?

Mine started off yesterday actually.

A little back story: My middle kitty Nova was sick about 6 months ago but after some medication he got better ... until a few weeks ago. He stopped eating and lost weight and then yesterday he started back with the drooling. I called our "regular" vet only to find out that the doctor we saw last time is no longer with that animal hospital - which seems to happen every time we need to take one of the kitties in. I had just had enough and decided to find somewhere else to go. I found a family owned vet office about a mile or so from my house and called to make an appointment.

This morning as soon as we got out the crate we use to take them to the vet, Nova started drooling. He ran off and tried to hide. We got everything ready, and off I went to the vet with him. James couldn't go because he had to work at 8am and that was the time of the appointment. I'm driving down the road in morning school zone traffic looking for a new vet office I've never been to while trying to assure my drooling, whining, crying kitty that everything is going to be ok. I passed the place and had to turn around and go back. We finally got there and went in. I asked if they would go ahead and put us in an exam room while I filled out the paperwork because he was just miserable and had pooped in the crate (as he usually does) out of nervousness. Fortunately they were able to do that and I got him cleaned up before the doctor came in.

There was some good news here ... this new vet is awesome! He really took the time to talk to me and check Nova out and get a full idea as to what was going on. Based on previous tests from the other vet and the symptoms I was describing, he concluded that Nova has Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Great. Who knew cats could get that?! He gave Nova a shot of steroid cortisol to help with the inflammation and said the first thing we need to do is figure out if he is having a reaction to a particular food item (i.e. Chicken, Tuna, etc.) and the only way to do that is by trial and error. Yea! More good news. Sigh. Who knows how long that will take, but if it makes him feel better then it will be worth it. Just stressful.

THEN ... :) After I got him home and settled - thankfully James is working from home today - I finished getting ready and headed for work. I realized half way there that I forgot to take my crazy pills this morning. I was hoping that one day wouldn't make a big difference and that I could just take them when I got home. But as the day has progressed, I've noticed my nerves getting more and more frazzled. I've had a really hard time concentrating all day, and I have quite a short fuse when it comes to sounds. For lunch, a guy who sits opposite me had a huge drink and spent the next few hours chewing every single piece of ice from his cup. Then a lady a few offices down has been on the phone most of the afternoon - strictly using the speaker phone. Really? Is that necessary? Pick up the handset! Gah. Plus another guy in an office right next to me had a couple of loud and rowdy meetings. And other people interrupting my work asking over and over when this one particular thing will be finished - even though I've told them as many times that I'm waiting for more information from an outside source before I can finish anything. Why don't people listen?! I don't get it.

But now, the day is nearing the end and right after work I am going to get a pedicure and that makes me super happy. I will get some much needed solitude and pampering. Then tomorrow I am going to get my eyebrows done so I look presentable when I see you all in Chicago! Which I am so happy is getting closer, yahoo!!!!!!

Anyhoo, thanks for letting me rant for a few. I feel better now. Have a great weekend friends!

What is with me!?

Again I have been neglectful of my blog. It's like if I read all of your blogs I think that I too have posted :) ha!

This month shall prove to be busy busy busy! Along with my 3x week yoga and 2-3x week cardio work outs, I have a salon appointment on Saturday, support group next Monday, happy hour on Talk Like a Pirate Day (the 19th for those not in the know), Maroon 5 concert with Beth, 2 different knitting meet ups and then of course BOOBs!!!! Not to mention a couple of doctor's appointments in there (some mine, some James'). Oh ... and let's not forget about work! Whew!

Other than all of that, my life is pretty normal at the moment. I am not worrying about the scale at all. I am watching what I eat and getting in my exercise. I could be better about my water intake though ... I'll work on that over the next week or two. I feel like I am in a pretty good place mentally with where I am weight wise. I'd LIKE to lose more, but I feel normal, I can shop in normal stores and I can do just about everything that I'd want to do. "Technically" according to various charts and graphs, I'm still overweight by 25 pounds. But I just don't know. I seem to be able to maintain successfully. And if I can do that and I'm content with where I am, should I push it? I just don't know. What do y'all think?

This one is funny ha ha

I have to share this blog with y'all .... Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit. If you haven't ever read it, please go and do so now. This guy is hilarious.

That is all.

BOOBs 2011 Fun Facts!

I'm a sucker for a survey so you know I am stoked to do this one!!

1.  How did you pick your blog name?
Losing Weight and Changing Habits … Honestly I don't remember how I came up with that. I was just trying to pick something that I thought made sense. I can't say I'm 100% thrilled with the name, it isn't very fun or exciting.

2.  When did you start blogging?
February 2011, which was 14ish months post-surgery. I wish I had started earlier.

3.  Theme of blog (weight loss, family, circus clowns, sci-fi, erotica, fly fishing, doll collecting, star wars, etc)
So weird that you ask this! My original intention was for my blog to be about how my family, who are coincidentally circus clowns, like to attend erotic sci-fi fly fishing tournaments with our star wars dolls but I thought that would be too complicated to explain, so I decided to write about weight loss instead.

4.  Did you go to BOOBs 2010?
Nope, but I'm excited to go this year!

5.  When were you banded?
December 23, 2009

6.  How much have you lost?
100 pounds, give or take a few depending on the day. I'd like to lose 20-30 more but I'm not in any huge rush.

7.  What are you most looking forward to at BOOBs?
A weekend away with some awesome new friends.

8.  What/who do you hope to find/see/accomplish at BOOBs 2011?
No clue. I'm open to whatever happens!

9.  Children? Pets?
No kids (by choice), 3 Cats - Yo Yo Meow, Casanova and Hobo Jack

10.  Who is your roomie?
I have the pleasure of rooming with Justine and Krystal!

11.  What day do you arrive?
Thursday Evening

12.  What airport/flight/time?
O'Hare, American Airlines 2364 arriving at 7:05pm
Stacey and I are planning on meeting at baggage claim soon after and sharing a cab if anyone wants to join in with us.

13.  What events are you signed up for?
Drag Show, Good Times Around Michigan Avenue, Second City Comedy Theater, Jazzercise and the official BOOBS get togethers. Other than that, I'm going to play it by ear! Possibly the tattoo outing, some dancing with Dawnya, working out in the hotel gym, maybe some impromptu Yoga in the lobby!

14.  Hobbies?
I'm a TV and movie addict! And I am a big reader (I love my Kindle!) I also knit and am starting to sew and I love photography.

15.  Career?
Short answer: I'm a Web Designer for Pier 1 Imports

Long answer: I studied Speech Pathology in college but when I got to the part of schooling where I actually had to DO that kind of work for real I learned that I hated it with the fiery passion of 1,000 suns. I went ahead and finished school since I only had a few months to go and wasn't going to quit at that point. I wandered aimlessly for a while doing this and that, and then in 1997 I taught myself how to create web pages and eventually worked my way to becoming a Web Designer. Been doing it ever since and I absolutely love it!

16.  Single? Married? In a relationship?
Married. James is my husband, we will be celebrating 9 years in November. We met at work in May of 1998, were friends for a couple of years before we started dating.

17.  Your birthday month?
March baby! The 23rd … which means I am an Aries. But more technically I'm on the Pisces/Aries cusp which is the craziest cusp to be on if you know anything about astrology. That is another thing I'm interested in :)

18.  What do you want other BOOBs to know about you?
Gosh, I don't know. Maybe Beth or Ronnie or Dawnya can tell you something about me. I'm not sure what kind of stuff I should share :) Although I will say that I am super excited that I've found such an awesome group of friends to share this journey with (man that sounds sappy!), so thanks!

Fill 'er up!

I went in this morning for a fill. It wasn't a big one, just a tiny tweak of .4 and I'm hoping it makes a difference!

Only a little bit of semi-bad news at my fill appointment, the tech said my pouch looks a tiny bit stretched out. She asked if I was waiting the appropriate amount of time after I ate to lounge or recline. And I have to admit, I haven't been as good with this as I need to be. I told her that and she said that was alright and that I should focus on that and it should correct itself in not too much time. So whew! After all, that is one of the reasons I wanted to get a fill, or at least get checked. At least I know now.

I am getting so excited about Chicago!!! I've signed up and paid for a few things, we are going to have a blast :)

Humpty Dumpty Day

Hello out there in Blog Land :)

As I just told Beth in an email, I've been having an issue with the chocolate almonds they sell at Smoothie King. They are deliciousness in a bag. And so you know, for the amount of calories in one bag, I would have to work out for 4 hours to balance things out. I have had a bag of these chocolate almonds at least 5 times over the past 2 weeks. Bad bad Debi.

But today is a new day and I did not get any chocolate almonds with my High Protein Almond Mocha smoothie this morning. Good good Debi! I am still at a deficit for last week and so far for this week, even with my weakness. And this week is only 1/2 way gone! I have hope that things will be great.

As for the Back to Basics challenge with the BOOBS, I think I am officially dropping out. I hate to do that, but I think the weighing is messing with my head and I really need to focus on the way I feel and how much stronger I am now than I was a few weeks ago. The scale is counterproductive to that end. So there you have it. I wish all the participants the best of luck and I am glad to have contributed to whatever your prize may be :)

I did not want to get out of bed this morning! I must've laid there and played Words With Friends for like 20 minutes! (Oh, and if anyone who plays that wants to play a game with me, my username is debidoodle.) But I finally got my patootie out of bed and got to work. Tonight I'm going over to my Dad's house because my sister is in from England for a visit. I haven't seen her in a couple of years so that will be fun to show off my new self tonight!

I know that Read posted this a while back about chatting/IM and I'd like to do the same. I L-O-V-E chatting/IMing with peeps. And it would be great to have some BOOBS to talk to during the day when I need a pick-me-up. So here is my info, please feel free to add me ... just let me know you are a BOOB in the invite.

MSN: debideloach@hotmail.com
AIM: DebiAtWork

I'm getting a fill ... maybe?

I just got off the phone making an appointment to have a fill next Monday morning. The only bad thing is that it is at 7:45 in the morning! Who is up that early?!?!?! (That is rhetorical of course, I know a lot of people are up that early :) )

The long and the short of it is that right now I feel like I am able to eat entirely too much at one sitting without much consequence. I might hiccup a little or something, but that's it. And the other thing is that I am able to eat too fast as well. I don't know why I am in a hurry, other than the fact that I don't like eating food that is supposed to be warm after it has gotten cold.

Let's take yesterday for an example. For lunch I had a half of a Great Outdoors sub sandwich. Turkey and cheese with lettuce, onion, etc. (no tomato though, ick). I did take off the bottom part of the bread while I was eating the sandwich, but then after I had the sandwich I ate 1/2 of that bottom piece of bread by itself. Then for dinner - and I know this wasn't the best choice, but it was what I was wanting - I had corn on the cob (1/2 ear), about 1/2 c of mashed potato, and 1 serving of fried okra. There was butter on the corn and I put salt on it but nothing on the taters other than how it came, which was just with a little pepper. Then later I had a Blue Bell (No Sugar Added) Krunch Bar for dessert.

Is that too much? How much are y'all able to eat at one sitting? Maybe I'm crazy!

Shout Outs and Thanks

Sweet sweet Dawnya texted me yesterday to check on me because I have been so quiet on my blog lately. I assured her I am just fine, just haven't been very chatty lately. It's been busy at work and since this is where I usually post from, it has sort of just fallen by the wayside. But I don't want her (or anyone) to worry about me, so I am making a point to post today!

I have been reading this week and there have been a few posts that have really hit home with me. One from Lyn at Escape from Obesity where she talks about how tired she is of counting calories and weighing food and obsessing over every little thing. I sort of feel like that right now. I feel like for the past several weeks it doesn't really matter what I do, nothing changes the scale. I touched on this in my video blog the other day - well, nothing has changed. I'm not going to stop being mindful of what I put into my body, but I am going to stop being a crazy nut job about it.

And on that same note, I think I actually said AMEN SISTER! out loud to the screen when I read Ronnie's post on Monday. I too am tired of all the reasons and excuses as to why the scale isn't moving, and I'm just over it. I've been eating a lot of calories this week. Even with that, I should still have a deficit overall for the week, which is really all I'm aiming for these days. My goal right now is to focus on how I feel and how my exercise is going. One hurdle at a time. Right?

Steph and her positivity posts have been making my days! I am usually a very positive person (at least positively crazy, that's for sure!) but I have my times where it is hard to keep that smile going and remember all the good things there are in life. So thanks Steph, you have made my week better with your posts and your wonderful spirit!

Jen's Brain Purge post really touched me. I know exactly how that feels. Just about every single word of it. The frustration, the stress, the emotion, the terror, the anger. I am so proud of you Jen for being brave enough to post that. Please know that it helped me. And I hope that in some small way that makes you feel better for posting it. :)

Amy's post about her yoga class made me smile! I'm not quite to the headstand stage yet, but I am determined to get there one day! And I'm with you, I L-O-V-E the balance poses. I did a full on Tree yesterday for the first time without falling over or needing the wall. I was quite proud of myself!

Draz's post about what you will do when the fat is gone seriously made me sit at my desk with my brain wheels turning for a good 20 minutes. I never thought I was one to eat my emotions … until I got banded. It wasn't until I could no longer push my emotions down with food that I realized I was that person. Then when you put that together with BBF Beth's post about being a sensitive person, I sort of started to get a picture in my mind. I've tried to be the person who didn't want to show that things people did or said hurt my feelings. I didn't want to be the "blabbering, crying fat girl". So in order to keep those feelings at bay, I would push them down with food. Now that I can't/won't do that anymore it has been an adjustment to let myself FEEL those feelings. Quite scary at times, but also very liberating.

Back when I was fat, I wasn't the girl that people would think to call when they wanted to do something fun or go somewhere neat. I don't know if it was because of my weight or because of the way that I let my weight make me be. I don't even know if that makes sense. I think my fat made me put up walls to protect myself, making me seem closed off and aloof at times. And now I'm allowing myself to tear those walls down and just be who I want to be. Everyone else be damned! I am now letting people know when they hurt my feelings, I am allowing myself to feel happy being me so that I don't feel like being closed off from others which then makes people want to call me and hang out with me. This is a big change for me.

So, now I just feel like I'm rambling. :)

However, in all seriousness. Thank you to all my blogging family out there. Every word you are brave enough to share helps someone at some point. Whether you realize it or not. I will try to remember that myself in the future and not stay quiet for so long for fear that I have nothing worth saying.

Have a great weekend!!!

Where have I been?

Seriously? I don't even know! It's been ages since I was here chatting it up.

I got a new iMac at work and I'm totally diggin' on the iSight camera! So, you get a treat today (hahahaha), I made a video!! It might be kind of quiet because I didn't want everyone in my office to hear me talking. I hope it isn't too bad. Enjoy

Monday Musings

I never thought I'd ever hear myself say this, but I wasn't able to work out tonight and I missed it! I had a good reason though :) It was Banded Support Group tonight and I hate to miss those! All the peeps are so much fun and I get some crazy inspiration from going.

I got a new computer at work today, an iMac, woo hoo! So I spent most of the day getting things set up the way I like them and therefore didn't have any time to read blogs - I am soooo behind! Maybe I'll have some time tomorrow. I hope so!

I am really happy today. No particular reason, just am. I love days like this.

That's all for now ... ta ta!

Thankful

I went out at lunch time today with a friend/co-worker, somehow we got on the discussion of size. Now, she has only worked with me for 6ish months so she never knew me when I was big. She has seen a picture, but she says she can't picture me like that and that it doesn't seem like its real. Anyway, I know a lot of us have problems seeing ourselves as we actually are once we begin to lose the weight, and I am no exception. While I know I'm not as big as I used to be, I still wouldn't consider myself "normal" sized. Apparently, that is just me. My friend said that from the first time she met me she never once thought to herself that I was big. She has always thought of me as just a normal sized person, average build. That really shocked me! She is a very beautiful girl and has a great figure, being around someone like that always makes me feel like I am a giant and just huge overall. But to know that my size never even entered her mind as a defining feature of me ... well, wow. That just made my whole week!

I know Beth was talking about a similar topic today on her blog, and it just struck me how thankful I am to all of you out there who might be reading. Knowing that I am not alone, knowing I have people I can turn to when I have a question or a problem or just want to vent. That is an amazing thing. Truly and completely amazing. I know people who don't have that kind of support and it makes a difference in the success that we can achieve. So thank you all!

Tonight is more yoga and I am super excited! Then we are going to see Horrible Bosses with James' work team. Should be fun :) Woo hoo!!!

Survey, I love these!

1. What is your occupation right now ?
I am the Web Production Designer for Pier 1 Imports. I do all the front end coding for pier1.com and customer emails.

2.What color are your socks right now?
No socks!

3. What are you listening to right now?
Duran Duran's Rio album

4. What was the last thing that you ate?
Oatmeal with Peanut Butter

5. Can you drive a stick shift?
Yep, every single day!

6. Last person you spoke to on the phone?
My BFF, on Saturday. I don't talk on the phone much!

7. Do you like the person you stole this blog from?
Yep!

8. How old are you today?
40 and fantastic!

9. What is your favorite sport to watch on TV?
None, I don't like sports at all.

10. What is your favorite drink?
Gosh, I don't know anymore. All I drink is water, orange juice and sometimes tea.

11. Have you ever dyed your hair?
All the time!

12. Favorite food?
Mexican

13. What is the last movie you watched?
Friends with Benefits, it was hilarious

14. Favorite day of the year?
My Birthday

15. How do you vent anger?
I usually cry

16. What was your favorite toy as a child?
Probably some stuffed animal

17. What is your favorite season?
We don't really have seasons here in Texas!

18. Cherries or Blueberries?
Cherries

19. Do you want your friends to blog this survey?
Sure, if they'd like to

20. Where is your favorite place to escape?
The Movies

21. Favorite TV Show?
Too many to name ... I'm seriously addicted to TV :) However, my all time fav is Friends.

22. Living arrangements?
I own a house and live with my husband James and our 3 kitties, Yo Yo Meow, Casanova and Hobo Jack.

23. When was the last time you cried?
Last week when something at work made me mad

24. What is on the floor of your closet?
A lot of junk, I need to clean it!

25. Who is the friend you have had the longest?
Matt, He was born when I was 10 days old and that's the first place my Mom ever took me, was to the hospital to visit him and his Mom :)

26. What did you do last night?
Watched True Blood and Breaking Bad

27. What are you most afraid of?
I honestly can't think of anything right now, so weird.

28. Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers?
Cheeseburgers! But I have a hard time eating them now :(

29. Favorite dog breed?
Cocker Spaniel

30. Favorite day of the week?
I don't really know ... Saturday I guess?

31. How many states have you lived in?
3: Texas, Florida, Illinois

32. Diamonds or pearls?
Diamonds

33. What is your favorite flower?
Gerbera Daisy

What A Day!

I have been up and going for about 15 1/2 hours already today, whew!!

Our team at work had some fun planned for this afternoon and that meant leaving work at 1pm. Well, we had a big update to our website coming on Monday which means I'd have to have it all done before 1pm and there was no way that was happening if I arrived at my normal time of 9:30ish. So, I decided I would get to work reallllllly early and get a lot done before people started showing up.

Which brings us to 5am this morning. I got up and showered and dressed and left the house at 5:30. Since there was so little traffic on the way in (ha!) I got there at 5:45 and went to my desk. It was blissfully quiet for 2 whole hours. I got a lot done and then some. They are starting some construction on my floor at work (adding new cubes) and they will be removing a wall that is right in front of my current cube. That is going to be very noisy, dusty and distracting. So I will be moving - temporarily only (boooo) - into an office for the duration, approx 4-6 weeks. However, I have a feeling it might take longer ... I bet some of the workers tools go missing which will set them back some time looking for them and then maybe replacing them :) Hahahahaha! Not really, but I wish I could do that! I got the majority of my stuff done, plus a few other things, AND had to pack up my cube to move on Monday, all by about 12:30. I was astonished!

We all left and went bowling! It was a lot of fun and I am happy to say that I won the prize for having the lowest score!!!!! I am very pleased with my prize and will cherish it always :) After we bowled and chatted it up for a while, everyone started heading out but it was still kind of early. So, I walked my happy little butt next door to the Movie Tavern and saw Captain America! It was really good, I enjoyed it a lot!! I was hungry since I hadn't eaten anything since about 9am (and it was 4pm now) so I had some chicken tenders and a few french fries. I also had a piece of cheesecake. I marked it all down in my food log and am still within my calorie goal for today, so it is all good! Now I am at home, doing a little laundry and playing games on the computer.

Tomorrow I am going to go back into work for a little bit to finish up a few little things that I didn't get done today. Then at 10:30 I am going to yoga!! I'm excited about that. No longer scared, so yay me! I'm not sure what I'll do after that, maybe lounge in the pool, maybe go see another movie, maybe hang out with my BFF. Who knows!

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend :) Bye for now!

Yoga!

I did it! I faced my fear and went to my very first yoga class ever.

I

LOVED

IT!!!

It was great! It was hard, I won't lie, and I had to modify a few of the poses to make it through. I sweated up a storm (and it wasn't even a heated class) and my muscles are all wobbly now. But it was fantastic and I can definitely see myself doing this regularly. I despise lifting weights so while I have a great cardio program going with the elliptical and treadmill, my toning was lacking. However, now that void will be filled with yoga!

Thanks to all my friends who encouraged me :) I couldn't have faced my fear without you all!

Challenge Weigh In Day

Good morning friends!

Yesterday was a great day for me. I felt good, I ate well, I exercised, I made good choices, I had fun. What more can you ask for?

The only issue I had at all yesterday was that we went to the grocery store to get some things and they had my very favorite flavor of Blue Bell ice cream in the world. It is only available a couple of times a year and I used to buy up the stock of it when I found it - but that was before I was banded. I haven't had any in almost 2 years. I was super hungry when we got to the store (which is usually a no-no) so when I saw that ice cream (Tin Roof for those wondering) I reallllllllllllllly wanted some. I forced myself to walk away and go down the aisle to pick up a box of the sugar free Blue Bell Moo Bars I've been having instead. Still delicious and only 100 calories for a bar. Vanilla ice cream with chocolate coating. They were out of them. I nearly cried! But I kept telling myself that it was only ice cream and not the end of the world. I kept in mind the weigh in for today and held strong. I can do this. And all my hard work paid off.

That is a loss of 2.2 pounds this week! And after my hiccup of gaining 3 pounds the 1st week of the challenge I am now 1.4 down from my beginning challenge weight!

I am super excited for our DFW BOOBS lunch this afternoon. I hope you all have a great Sunday!

Saturday!

I got up before 7am this morning. It was not on purpose. My cats woke me up. Need I say more? Oh well ...

I fed them and cleaned their box then hung out and played on the computer for a while. A little after 9am I left to head to my hair appointment. It wasn't until 10:15, but I wanted to stop and get a smoothie first. I did just that and it was delicious! I got my hair all fixed up (will try to get some pictures tomorrow to post) and chatted w/ my hairdresser about my upcoming yoga class. She said that she understands my fear, that everyone feels that way the first time. She said not to worry and that everyone there is super nice and they love newbies so that made me feel better.

Then I went to Target to pick up a few new pieces of workout clothing. I grabbed some things and then headed to my office to hit the fitness center. I had it all to myself again, I love that! I got up on my friend the elliptical and headed to town. After 30 minutes there I went to the treadmill and went for 20 minutes there. I alternated between high incline/walking and no incline/running. Most of it was walking, which is fine! I did snap a pic for posterity today, you can see my friend the elliptical behind me!

That's about all for now! Have a great day :)

Is it 5 o'clock yet?

I did pretty good yesterday. I managed my 500 calorie deficit (plus a few for good measure) and pushed myself with the elliptical and felt really happy with my workout yesterday.

That being said ... I'm ready for today to be over :)

I got to work and went right in to a 2+ hour meeting. A software demo from a company we are considering purchasing a new system from. This is the 3rd one of these in the past 2 weeks and while they are interesting and cool, they are also a big time suck and I'm glad they are done now.

I decided I am not going to the fitness center after work today. I might do some Just Dance when I get home but I am worn out and think I deserve an evening off from that place. As I look back at my blog from Monday I see that I said I would go Wed-Fri but that is because I wasn't planning on going on Tuesday. Since I did, I am still hitting my planned 3 days of the fitness center after work.

However, next week I am stepping COMPLETELY out of my comfort zone and trying something I have been wanting to try for a while now. I am terrified, but am going to do it anyway. I signed up for a trial 10 day membership at a yoga studio. My hairstylist also teaches yoga at this studio and has been encouraging me to try it for a little while. They were having a special, 10 days for $20. I figure even if I hate it and only go to 1 class I'm only out $20, right? So far I've signed up for 5 classes during those 10 days. Starting next Tuesday evening with my friend/hairdresser in a Raw Beginner class. Specifically tailored to people who have never done yoga before (i.e. me!). What if I can't do the moves? I am not very strong or flexible. What if I fall over? What if I make a fool of myself? What if I'm still too fat to bend myself into those positions????? These are the things going through my head. That is why I am terrified. But, I'm going to try it anyway. That's what this is all about right? Stepping out of our comfort zones and just trying.

I am getting my hair colored tomorrow morning (from above mentioned friend/hairdresser/yoga instructor) so that I will look spiffy for our DFW BOOBS lunch on Sunday afternoon! I am excited to meet some peeps in person before Chicago, yay!!!

I hope you all have a great weekend :)

Wonders Never Cease

I don't know if I've mentioned this before or not, but when I go work out in the fitness center here at work I watch TV on my phone. It helps to pass the time and that way I get to watch something I'm interested in and am not subjected to the horrible things they play on the TV's provided,  i.e. News (boring), Food Shows (seriously?), Reality TV (kill me now), etc.

I've been watching Doctor Who and am loving it. Yesterday I got on the elliptical and set it all up for 15 minutes and started my latest episode of Doctor Who and went to ellipticalling. Before I knew it, those 15 minutes were up but I wasn't tired ... so I put in another 15 minutes! For those of you keeping track that is 30 MINUTES OF ELLIPTICAL! And I wasn't even dying when I got off! I couldn't believe it. I am so excited about this! I can't wait to go today and do 30 minutes off the bat, I am loving it! Now, mind you I am still working on the lowest resistance, but seeing as how a few weeks ago I was panting like a dog after 10 minutes I think I'm doing great :) After my elliptical fun I did 20 minutes on the treadmill, then some stretching and went home.

That's all the excitement I have for today friends. I will be working out again this evening and might even try to push up the resistance a little, we will see how I feel.

Have a great day!

It's a good day :)

This is an odd feeling for me. I am actually looking forward to working out tonight. I'm not sure where it comes from, but I'll take it. I didn't get in a work out on Sunday or on Monday so I guess I'm craving it. Who would have ever thought. :)

I've done fairly well with my eating the past 2 days. I was below my calorie intake goal both days, but I did not meet my calories burned goal either day. Either way I had a deficit of approx 430ish each day which isn't bad. I am going on the assumption that today will be excellent!!

On a completely unrelated note, I finished the bag I was making! Here it is in all it's glory :)

Front of the Bag

Back of the Bag

  

Inside, with Pocket

Giant Button!

  

Kitty Girl giving it her approval :)

Have a great day everyone!

Happy Monday!

There it is folks. Down 1.6 pounds for the week! You can also see my awesome new pedicure. I don't remember the name of the color, but it is a turquoisey blueish color. I love it!

Harry Potter was incredible. And I did REALLY good at the theatre! I had the fruit and cheese plate to eat. Pineapple, grapes, strawberries, some whole grain crackers and some kind of soft cheese with garlic in it. It was delicious and very low calorie, woo hoo!

I did not work out yesterday, which I'm kind of bummed about, but it will be alright. Except that I don't think I can do a full workout today either. And tomorrow I have plans after work, eek! I will do some Just Dance after I get home tonight and then Wed-Fri I will work out each evening after work.

Here is what I was doing after seeing Harry Potter yesterday. It's not quite finished yet, have to make the inside lining which will be the striped fabric. I should get it finished this evening over at BFF's house, she is helping me decipher the pattern but I am doing all the cutting and sewing.

I hope you all have a fantastic day :)

p.s. Only 10.5 weeks til BOOBS in Chicago!

Weekend Wawesomeness!

Yes yes, I know that isn't a word ... but I don't care!

Last night after work I went and had a pedicure. It was wonderful as usual. I even met a very nice lady and we chatted it up the whole time. I'll post a picture tomorrow for my weigh in on the challenge :)

Today I woke up and got the urge to go and work out. So I did! I stopped and got a Smoothie King on the way, they have a new smoothie called the Lean 1. It is pretty good and a small chocolate one is less than 300 calories and 22 grams of protein. Then I headed to my work to hit the fitness center. It was awesome, completely empty! I did 15 minutes on the elliptical, 15 on the treadmill with some incline and some running, then 20 on the bike. I watch TV shows on my phone with Netflix while I work out which makes the time go by really fast!

Then I went home and got in the pool for about an hour. It was great, except it is soooooooo hot! Plus our neighbors right behind us are having a birthday party for one of their kids complete with trampoline, giant blow up water slide and lots of kids screaming. Oh well, they sounded like they were having fun and that is what counts :)

I'm not sure what else I will do today. I hope you all are having a great day!!!

TGIF!

Happy Friday my friends!

I worked out again last night and accomplished my goal of 14 minutes on the elliptical, woo hoo!!! I also did a turn on the treadmill (including a little bit of running) and the bike as well as my stretching and sit ups. There were a few more people in the fitness center yesterday but I didn't let that deter me. I just went about my business as if they weren't there and made myself not care if I looked silly running or doing my sit ups. Who cares what they think right? Some of them looked kinda silly with their exercising anyway, so who are they to judge :)

I'm going to get a pedicure after work tonight. Bye bye to the 4th of July stars. Not sure if I'll do another design or not this time, I'll have to see how the mood strikes me when I get there. I'm not sure I will get much working out in today, but I might do some more Just Dance when I get home. It is fun and you can do as little or as much as you want. So that is awesome. 

I don't know what my plans are for tomorrow, but I'm sure some working out will be involved. And possibly some pool time! Then on Sunday morning James and I will go see Harry Potter and I'm so excited! Then after that I am going over to my best friends house and she is going to help me sew up a super cute purse/bag. She made one for herself the other day and I just love it so I'm going to make one for me!

Are any of y'all doing anything fun this weekend??? Share!!!

Dance Dance Dance!

Yesterday I decided to do something different to work up a sweat. I got out my Wii and played some Just Dance 2! They have this section called "Just Sweat" where you aren't really competing with anyone, just accumulating sweat points. You get to a certain number of sweat points every day. I chose the Hard program which is 1000 points a day. I was on a roll though and went til I hit 2000! It has super fun songs like Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne, Call Me by Blondie, Jump by Kriss Kross ... so fun! And it really doesn't feel like working out. Until you are done and all sweaty :)

I just realized that the previous paragraph has the word (or derivation thereof) sweat in it 5 times!

Today I have my workout clothes again to hit the fitness center after work. I'm pretty excited about it, I'm going to try for 14 minutes on the elliptical today. I'll see how I feel on the treadmill today as to whether it is a running or an incline kind of day. I don't think I'm ready to run at an incline yet though, ha!

Also ... tomorrow is the premiere of the very last Harry Potter movie. I am excited and sad all at the same time. A friend of mine at work got special passes and went to see it on Monday and said it was fantastic. I can't wait! Who else is a Harry Potter fan out there? When are you going to see the movie?

Better and better

I worked out again last night, and this time I went 12 minutes on the elliptical! I didn't run as much on the treadmill but did a higher incline and walked for a longer period of time. Then more bike and more stretching and sit ups/leg lifts. I felt pretty good about it all.

Thank you all so much for the words of encouragement. They mean so much to me! I am having an easier time resisting the foods that aren't as good for me right now too. I won't say "bad foods" because nothing is supposed to be bad, as long as it is in moderation, right?! Since I'm having trouble with moderation right now, I'm choosing to abstain from some things while I'm working this challenge.

Have a great day everybody!!

Whoa Nellie

A week since my last update? So sorry friends!

I had a B.A.D. Sunday. I got on the scale for the BOOBs challenge to find out that I had gained 3 pounds.

Gained.

Three.

Pounds.

What is up with me?!? So after a few hours of crying and whining about it. I decided to suck it up and admit that I have been less than stellar on the choices and the activity. I immediately remedied that by going to work out at my office's fitness center - which is blessedly empty on a Sunday afternoon! I managed 10 straight minutes on the elliptical (an amazing feat for me) plus some actual running on the treadmill and some biking as well as stretching and some sit ups. I felt much better after I did all of that and have been doing very very good since Sunday.

I went to my support group last night and confessed all. That was really hard for me to do, but I did it. And I have my work out clothes with me to hit the fitness center again today after work. Yahoo!!

I sure hope everyone else is doing better than I am :)

Happy 5th of July!

Heh :) I like to keep the party going .. who says we can only celebrate on the 4th??

I am so excited about the BOOBs trip I can't even stand it! I think all the travel plans are squared away all that is left is the packing and the waiting!

I am doing the challenge, I sent in my $10 and my picture proof of starting weight. I will share it here as well:

So, there is that. I love that we have to send in a picture as proof! And you can also see how patriotic I was being with my pedicure :) I love the stars!!!

Anyhoo ... I am excited, and I am ready to challenge, and I am positive. What else can I ask for??

I'm going to BOOBS!

I'm so excited! I got my plane ticket this morning and am counting the days til Chicago to meet all of you :) Still trying to get the details worked out on the room situation but I'm sure it will all get sorted out in plenty of time!

I'm arriving on Thursday evening, I don't want to miss a minute of the fun! Is anyone else arriving then? My flight arrives at 7:05pm, I guess I'm going to take a cab to the hotel. Unless anyone has a better suggestion. Maybe someone arriving around the same time would like to share a cab with me?

I can't wait!!

Y'all are awesome!

Thank you so much for all the wonderful words of encouragement to my last crazy ass post. Today is much better. Tomorrow will be even more better. (nice English, huh?)

I am working on possibly joining the BOOBS in Chicago! Currently trying to figure out the rooming situation and get the husband used to the idea of me going off for a fun filled weekend without him. Hopefully all will go well on all fronts and I will be able to go and meet all my inspirers! (I don't think that is actually a real word, but it should be.)

I'm having dinner with a friend tonight. She and I met in middle school ... aaaaaaages ago :) She lives in Oklahoma but is here for a few days visiting friends and family and so we are going to get to catch up. I'm pretty excited about it!

I am feeling much better about my line of thinking about this not being a race. I am already so much better off now than I was 2 years ago. And 2 years from now it will be that much more. I am channeling my zen thoughts and taking it one day at a time.

Oooohhhhhhmmmm ...

Slippery slope

Friends. I am sliding. I don't know why. I can't seem to grab on to anything to make myself stop. My willpower is nearly non existent. I need help.

I actually caught myself hiding food this weekend. That is something I didn't do very often, but I just didn't want to deal with listening to my husband tell me I shouldn't have those chocolate almonds, when I reallllllly wanted them. I knew it was bad when I was doing it. But I could not make myself quit. I need help.

I tried on about 5 different shirts this morning because I didn't like the way I looked in anything! I felt really fat and ugly in everything. I need help.

I have been looking around at y'alls blogs for inspiration. To kick me in the ass. I found 2 quotes that hit me over the head.

“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” – Confucius
From Rachel at Rachel Thin Within

“You never fail until you stop trying.” - Albert Einstein
From Leslie at Band Sweet Band

I think I've been putting a lot of pressure on myself to hurry up and get to my goal weight. So much so that I might have snapped a little bit. I'm going to try and learn from Confucius and Einstein and slow it down. This is not a race. This is for the rest of my life. There will be bumps on this road, and apparently right now I'm on a part that needs some serious attention from the DOT!

I know that I will stumble. I know my friends and family will be there to help me back on to my path. I know my life will never be as it was. I have to believe that I will be a success. I know that I need to make more changes. But there is one thing that will never change ... I will always need help.

So much for that ...

I'm not 100% sure why, but I sort of just quit my challenge on Thursday. I think it had to do with several things. Work stress, TOM coming unexpectedly, scale frustration, etc. I haven't gone completely off the rails or anything ... just kind of stopped being uber vigilant.

And you know what? I'm OK with that. I weigh less today than I did the first day of the challenge, and isn't that always the goal??? :)

Checking in

Yesterday was not too bad for a Tuesday!

I don't have a lot of time (heading to see Spamalot with Beth tonight!) but I got out of my workshop and wanted to do a quick update before I make like a tree.

Today's Weight: Honestly, no idea. I didn't even bother to get on the scale this morning!

Burned: 2062
Consumed: 1403
Deficit: 659
Steps: 2876
Activity: 13 minutes

Short and sweet is the order of the day. Til tomorrow!

Better day, in spite of the numbers

Hello friends! I've been in a workshop all day which is why I'm only just now getting my info posted from yesterday. It was a super fun workshop though - for any web geeks out there it was about User Experience and how to create a website that customers will shop.

Anyhoo, I digress ...

Today's weight did not make any sense! It said 186.6. That is, it didn't make any sense until I started counting and realized that TOM is headed my way. (Warning: possible TMI coming your way) I have a Mirena IUD so my TOM isn't the same now as it used to be. The outward aspects are very slight now - if at all some months, but apparently the internal things (i.e. hormones, bloat, mood) are still there, so sometimes I forget. All of that to say that hopefully this is the explanation I was begging for about the weirdness on the scale and also my 'Bummer of a birthmark, Hal' mood from yesterday!

And now, on to the other numbers!

Burned: 1993
Consumed: 1307
Deficit: 686
Steps: 2293
Activity: 63 minutes

I will admit that because of my weight yesterday (and also possibly my mood) that I didn't want to eat much. Hubby finally made me eat something for dinner so I didn't starve myself. Not that I was really at that much risk ;) but you know, trying to be responsible blah blah blah.

I'm feeling better about things today although I'm quite hungry at the moment. They provided lunch during my workshop but of course it was a sandwich .. which I can't really eat. They did have some salad so I had a bit of that and thankfully I had some greek yogurt and cottage cheese in the fridge upstairs. Otherwise I think my stomach grumbling would have disrupted our afternoon session! I will make sure to bring some band friendly stuff for me to eat tomorrow during our lunch break. OH! I am super proud of myself that I didn't have any cookies or chocolate during the entire workshop! The presenters brought all these different kinds of chocolate truffles and then from the lunch they had a whole plate of different kinds of cookies. I was successful in refraining, so yay for me!

Anyway, that's about all for now. I hope everyone is having a great day. And, for those who didn't get my reference earlier, here is the Far Side cartoon that I was referencing. Enjoy!